virtually Mitch

There was a time when I really looked forward to festival concerts. A mass of people all coming together to see some great bands and uniting in an experience which will leave an indelible mark on their being. A defining moment waiting to happen. Carloads of beautiful and exotic women. Membership in the "I was there!" club. The clamor of sweaty youth creating a culture of cool. The diversity of alternativeness. Whatever the reasons were exactly, it was something to do. Having been to many festivals, ones which are obviously much more awesome than any new ones can manage, I guess that I have had my fill of them and they have lost my interest as I now grow my waist size.

There are many, many reasons that I can think of now to avoid festival concerts. Ticket prices are too much. Travel to the concert is too costly. Parking is a hassle. People suck and there will be a lot of people hanging around sucking. There is a lot of waiting. I mean *a lot* of waiting. There are many bands that you are not interested in seeing and the ones that you really want to see are playing at the same time on different stages. It costs $20k for a bottled water. It is illegal to check out most of the ladies there. You step in lots of unidentifiable stinky stuff that you will manage to track everywhere for the next week. There is always the one integral thing that you forget to bring which dampens the whole day. The sound is usually crap. The food is crap. The crappers are crap.  I am wondering now why I enjoyed the shows that I went to. It must have been the beer. Beer in the parking lot, in the line, in the beer garden, in the pit, in the back of the venue. It must have been.

There is a reason why I am ranting now. There is an upcoming festival concert that I want to attend. Van's Warped Tour will arrive at the Gorge on August 9th. It is chock full of bands that I want to see like Anberlin, Evergreen Terrace, Every Time I Die, MC Chris, Norma Jean, Reel Big Fish, Relient K, Rise Against, and Story Of The Year. That is nine (9) bands that I want to see. Three of them I really want to see, Anberlin, Relient K, and Rise Against. Especially Rise Against who has vaulted into my top ten bestest bands ever list. The ticket price for this colossal event is a mere $29.05. Nice! Premier parking is $25 and camping is another $40 (or 80 for two nights). Gas will cost $3,800. So I can manage the show at about $4,000. But… the Gorge in August will be 190 degrees and the perspiration that drips off my dehydrated body will burst into flame before it hits the ground. That is in addition to the other types of lameness that I could expect as listed above.

I need to figure this out some more.